It's amazing how much changes when you lose weight. You don't realize that it affects every aspect of your life. At least I really didn't realize until I lost it. I am still 74 lbs away from goal and can't even imagine how different it will be then too. I don't normally give advice because everyones situation is different but if anyone out there is considering WLS and have a husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend please from the beginning start counseling. Make sure to involve your significant other in everything from start to finish. I have learned my lesson on this and if there is any regret in my body right now it is that I didn't do this. I never thought it would be so hard emotionally as it is today. I am happy I did this and wouldn't change it EVER, I am proud of the accomplishments I have achieved and will never go back. I however didn't take the one person who is solid in my life , the one person who will be with me till the end ..... With me from the beginning and I am mad at myself for that. However with all that being said I have realized my error and from this point counseling begins and my journey is his journey too!!! I am looking forward to counseling and know that we will be even stronger after this then we were and we will realize together what we need to survive and make not only ourselves better but our marriage better.
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Friday, January 17, 2014
Officially lost 100 lbs !!!
I have been fighting with my scale for the past month and I finally won!!!! 218 this morning!!! Finally!!! 100 lbs gone and never to be seen again. I really thought I would never see that number. My next big goal under 200.. that I haven't seen since 1998. Still have a lot of work ahead of me but I see the light at the end of the tunnel.
This journey has had it's ups and downs so far but it has all been worth it!! One thing about blogging is that I am not sure if I am repeating things from other blogs. But today I want to talk about Head Hunger. Something I have been also fighting with lately. I have had many episodes where I find myself eating something when I am not hungry. Sometimes I use the excuse I have a headache so I must need to eat something. It gets frustrating and I am working on finding something to help me stop with that. I know sometimes its because I'm bored or upset which is more emotional eating but I feel like the emotional eating is more under control. Not 100% and I really don't think I can control it 100% ever. I am trying something at work to help with head hunger , I usually keep my side drawer filled with snacks. Healthy ones like Almonds, string cheese...... etc. Well I am cleaning the drawer out and no more than one snack will be in there. I feel like the more in there the more I am wanting and eating when I am not actually hungry. I am hoping this will help. I am really excited to get my foot boot off so I can start really pushing myself at the gym. I know I am capable of so much more and these next few months till summer I will be. I have a few 5K's lined up one in March on the 16th in Elmhurst and one on May 17th Run for the Roses in LaGrange Park. I am so excited for them and plan on NOT breaking my foot this time.
This journey has had it's ups and downs so far but it has all been worth it!! One thing about blogging is that I am not sure if I am repeating things from other blogs. But today I want to talk about Head Hunger. Something I have been also fighting with lately. I have had many episodes where I find myself eating something when I am not hungry. Sometimes I use the excuse I have a headache so I must need to eat something. It gets frustrating and I am working on finding something to help me stop with that. I know sometimes its because I'm bored or upset which is more emotional eating but I feel like the emotional eating is more under control. Not 100% and I really don't think I can control it 100% ever. I am trying something at work to help with head hunger , I usually keep my side drawer filled with snacks. Healthy ones like Almonds, string cheese...... etc. Well I am cleaning the drawer out and no more than one snack will be in there. I feel like the more in there the more I am wanting and eating when I am not actually hungry. I am hoping this will help. I am really excited to get my foot boot off so I can start really pushing myself at the gym. I know I am capable of so much more and these next few months till summer I will be. I have a few 5K's lined up one in March on the 16th in Elmhurst and one on May 17th Run for the Roses in LaGrange Park. I am so excited for them and plan on NOT breaking my foot this time.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Random Thoughts
Well I have been juggling about 2 or 3 lbs for the past couple of weeks. I need to stop stepping on the scale everyday . It use to be a motivator it has now become a dictator. Dictator of my day and how I am feeling. The scale is only one measurement and I need to stop making it the only one . I measure myself too and take monthly pics those still motivate me. I also hate that the scale at home and the scale at the gym are off by 4 lbs. Thats a big difference and frustrates me. I will get over that eventually. I have gotten to a mental block that has been pissing me off, I feel like I am not going to get any lower on the scale. The constant back and forth has made me start thinking this way. I am trying to smack myself out of this but sometimes you mind is too strong. I know once my foot is healed and I can start really pushing myself more I will snap out of this and once the weather gets better too. Winter sucks!!! I guess this is a bitch fest today and I am sorry but I need to vent and typing it out is a great release for me.
I had an awesome vacation and really had some quality time spent with my girls and hubby. I just can't get over how fast these kids grow up. Emilee is such a smart little girl and I loved having conversations with her. Kaylee is at that point where I really need to be there for her emotionally. She is such a kind hearted kid and gets so emotional. I complain sometimes because I don't have a boy and girls are so hard for me but it is times like this vacation that I really appreciate them and couldn't ask for two better kids. Went sledding with them over vacation and I really sledded. I had so much fun went down the hill so many times and back up the hill and not once got out of breath!!! I don't even remember being able to do that when I was a kid. It was awesome! I was sore as hell the next day but it was worth it.
I am going to be celebrating 6 months post op this month on the 22nd. I can't believe it. I was hoping to be in Onderland by then but I know that won't happen. That's ok I will get there. The weight is coming off so much slower now and it is so hard to accept it. Zumba starts on Friday , I think I am still going to go so the girls can have some fun. I may participate but obviously not do all the jumping and stuff.
I had an awesome vacation and really had some quality time spent with my girls and hubby. I just can't get over how fast these kids grow up. Emilee is such a smart little girl and I loved having conversations with her. Kaylee is at that point where I really need to be there for her emotionally. She is such a kind hearted kid and gets so emotional. I complain sometimes because I don't have a boy and girls are so hard for me but it is times like this vacation that I really appreciate them and couldn't ask for two better kids. Went sledding with them over vacation and I really sledded. I had so much fun went down the hill so many times and back up the hill and not once got out of breath!!! I don't even remember being able to do that when I was a kid. It was awesome! I was sore as hell the next day but it was worth it.
I am going to be celebrating 6 months post op this month on the 22nd. I can't believe it. I was hoping to be in Onderland by then but I know that won't happen. That's ok I will get there. The weight is coming off so much slower now and it is so hard to accept it. Zumba starts on Friday , I think I am still going to go so the girls can have some fun. I may participate but obviously not do all the jumping and stuff.
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